You’re sitting on your bed at 2 a.m., phone in hand, scrolling through texts you’ve already read a dozen times. He canceled plans again. Again. And when you asked why, he said, ‘I just need space.’ But you’ve been giving him space for months. Now you’re wondering: should you just tell him to buzz off? The answer isn’t about being dramatic. It’s about whether you’ve been losing yourself in the quiet.
Some people turn to distractions when things get heavy. There’s a whole industry built around temporary escapes-like euro girls escort london-where people pay for attention that doesn’t come with emotional strings. But real relationships don’t work like that. You can’t outsource your loneliness. And you shouldn’t have to.
What Does ‘Buzz Off’ Actually Mean?
Saying ‘buzz off’ sounds like a punchline. But underneath it? It’s a cry for boundaries. It’s not about being mean. It’s about realizing you’ve stopped asking for what you need because you’re afraid of the answer. You’ve started making excuses for him: ‘He’s stressed.’ ‘He’s working late.’ ‘He’s just not good with words.’ But words aren’t the issue. Consistency is.
Think about it. When was the last time he initiated something just because he wanted to spend time with you? Not because you asked. Not because it was your birthday. Just because he missed you? If the answer is months, then you’re not in a relationship-you’re in a waiting room.
Why You’re Holding On
You’re not holding on because you still love him. You’re holding on because you’re scared of starting over. You’re scared of being alone in a city where everyone else seems to have it figured out. You’re scared that if you walk away, you’ll be the one who ‘failed.’ But here’s the truth: staying in a relationship that doesn’t meet your basic needs isn’t loyalty. It’s self-neglect.
People confuse comfort with love. Comfort is when he texts you back after three days. Love is when he texts you because he saw a dog that looked like yours and thought of you. Comfort is when he says ‘I love you’ on Valentine’s Day. Love is when he remembers how you take your coffee and brings it to you without being asked.
The Real Test: What Happens When You Say No
Try this: next time he cancels, don’t ask why. Just say, ‘Okay.’ Then go do something you love. Go to that art exhibit you’ve been putting off. Call your sister. Walk through the park without your phone. See what happens.
If he notices and asks where you’ve been? That’s a sign he still cares. If he doesn’t? That’s your answer.
Most people don’t leave because they stop loving. They leave because they stop respecting themselves. And that’s the hardest part to admit.
What ‘Buzzing Off’ Really Looks Like
Telling someone to buzz off doesn’t mean screaming at them. It doesn’t mean deleting their number. It means quietly choosing yourself. It means not answering when you’re not in the mood. It means not showing up when you’re exhausted. It means letting silence speak louder than your pleading texts.
There’s a myth that breaking up is messy. The truth? The messiest part is staying. The real mess is waking up every day pretending you’re okay with less than you deserve.
What Comes After
After you say goodbye-or after you stop chasing, which is the same thing-you’ll feel empty. That’s normal. But that emptiness? It’s not a void. It’s space. Space for you to remember who you were before you started shrinking to fit into his rhythm.
You’ll start saying no to things that drain you. You’ll start saying yes to things that light you up. You’ll find friends who show up. You’ll rediscover hobbies you forgot you loved. You’ll stop checking your phone every five minutes. And slowly, without even noticing, you’ll stop wondering if he’s thinking about you.
That’s when you know you’re healing.
When to Walk Away-And When to Fight
This isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being real. If he’s emotionally unavailable, but he’s trying-going to therapy, talking about his fears, making small changes-that’s worth a conversation. If he’s emotionally absent and doesn’t even see the problem? That’s not fixable. Not by you.
You can’t fix someone who won’t look in the mirror. And you shouldn’t have to.
There’s a difference between helping someone grow and carrying their emotional weight alone. One builds a partnership. The other builds resentment.
Final Thought: You Deserve More Than ‘Maybe’
Love shouldn’t feel like a gamble. You shouldn’t have to wonder if he’ll show up. You shouldn’t have to count the days between texts like they’re tickets to a concert you’re not sure you’ll get into.
There are people out there who don’t make you beg for attention. Who don’t make you feel like you’re too much-or not enough. Who show up, not because they’re forced to, but because they choose to.
You don’t need to tell him to buzz off. You just need to stop waiting for him to knock.
And when you do? The silence won’t feel so loud anymore.
By the way-have you ever noticed how some people treat relationships like a service? Like they’re entitled to comfort without giving anything back? It’s not just about him. It’s about a culture that tells women to be patient, to be understanding, to wait. But no one ever tells you that your time matters too. That your peace matters more than his convenience.
There’s a whole world out there full of people who don’t make you question your worth. You just have to stop looking in the wrong places. Like scrolling through profiles of
And you? You deserve presence.